@TheRealRHB: As my friend Joe's last wish I had him cremated and sprinkled his ashes into the coffee pots at work..all morning everyone had a cup of Joe
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@pumpkin_horse: *lays down on memory foam mattress* mattress: remember that time you pooped your pants in 3rd grade? me: I regret buying you
@UncleDuke1969: "How much for this toaster?" "An arm & a leg." "How about a leg & 2 fingers?" "A leg & 3 fingers." "Deal!" - Cannibal Pawn Stars
@trevso_electric: Thank you for ordering this $2 necklace from Etsy. With shipping your total comes to $758,937. Item will arrive from Uzbekistan in 3 years
@rolldiggity: Prince: "The slipper fits! You're the girl I met!" Girl: "I wasn't even at the ball. This is a common shoe size." Prince: "YOU'RE THE GIRL!"