@clarkekant: Ask your doctor if an unnecessary over-prescribed medication so he can get kickbacks from a pharmaceutical company is right for you.
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@longwall26: God: So I was, all, what if there was a fish made of jelly? Like, jelly but alive and in the sea? LOL [angels look nervously at one another]
@just1fool: Sleeping with me is a lot like sleeping with a stuffed animal. But that's only after I've eaten Mexican food.
@jonnysun: ME: did it hurt GIRL AT BAR: did wat hurt ME: when ur hopes of having a nice uninterupted night out got crushed bc i started talking to u