@LukeAdams95: Ask your siblings to close your door and they will start telling u how u treated them 3 months ago
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@GrowlyGrego: "Thanks for turning me into an expression of contempt. Sorry about making delicious nourishment so damned accessible." -Low-hanging fruit
@mattZillaaaa: Saw a young couple holding hands today & it reminded me that I need to buy a bottle of vodka
@Abusitron: ME: I need you to look at my balls, doc *removes pants* DR: Ok what seems to be the problem? ME: *swivels hips sensually* Nuthin
@FrenulumBreve: ME: [licking lips in anticipation] I'm nervous. I've never done a bungee jump before. INSTRUCTOR: don't lick my lips again.