@_thatigirl: Asked what I look for in a relationship. Apparently, "A way out" wasn't the right answer.
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@hipstermermaid: I can’t believe it’s already been 10 zoips since I invented my own system for measuring time.
@Snarfernini: He: How are you? Me: Thanks, but I'm too old for you He: I was going to ask about your wireless prov... Me: Just keep telling yourself that
@_SingleBabyMama: I figured out the best time to go grocery shopping these days is at 3:45 AM, before the Girl Scouts even wake up. Ha, I'll show them.