@brennadine: At bedtime I read my daughter a few of my favorite RTs, tuck her in & whisper, "This is why we don't talk to strangers on the internet."
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@jacquiewalters: "What should we name them?" Grapes "And what about these?" Grapefruits "I see. So one is a larger version of another?" Not at all "Perfect"
@_davidlucas_: *Takes gift wrapping paper to the counter* Her: Did you want to buy that? Me: No, I just wanted to hold it for a while.