@markleggett: At some point, male "pick-up artists" are just going to start chasing women around like Benny Hill.
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@MoneypennyNaked: Married girls are so lucky. They can post anything they want on here because they already tricked some dumb guy into marrying them.
@tastefactory: *tree falls in forest, quickly stands up and looks around to see if anybody heard it, brushes self off*
@cowyfwame: I just don't understand why Flo from Progressive needs to have an apron on to sell car insurance.
@2014longview: Cop pulled me over said "papers" I replied with "scissors, I win" and drove off. Now I'm doing hard time on the rock.