@jonnysun: *at the movie theater* umm ok the hackers also said theyd do a terror unless u giv me unlimited free popcorn and uh.. also that guys popcorn
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@McKnightyBoo: My 17yo pretends he doesn't understand how the washer works when I ask him to do the laundry Congrats, you're finally a man
@slyoung5: Have you ever noticed that Santa brings better gifts to the kids that have rich parents?
@chrisrockozfan: Most people don't realize this, but you can eat organic, all natural, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you.
@juliussharpe: Oscar Pistorius has the worst alibi ever. Who the hell would break into your house to rob your bathroom?