@SpankMeIm0ty: At the rate I'm throwing shit out as I pack to move there's a strong possibility not all the kids will make it to the new house
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@noog: World: Hey check out this sport we made called football. America: *sips beer* Check out this other sport I just made called football.
@pleatedjeans: new boss: mind sharing an office? me: no NB: Good [points to room filled w/wolves] bc we finally contained them please keep the door closed
@NYC_Blonde: Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know which one of your friends your ex is going to sleep with next
@trentistweeting: [2 paintings talking] "hey man, guess what im doing this weekend?" please dont say it "JUST HANGING!" i wanna move to a different gallery