@Tetley6969: At the restaurant I heard a lady say her taco was too salty. My wife had to leap over the table and cover my mouth before I said something.
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@PeaceInTruth1: Telemarketer: Good afternoon, Sir. Me: Do you walk with a limp? Telemarketer: No. Me: Want to? Telemarketer: Thank you for your time.
@PaperWash: Tell us a scary story! Ok kids, gather around *holds flashlight up to face And I'll tell you all that is evil *puts wedding tape in VCR
@AHundredElbows: Border Patrol never did chase down that illegal baby food smuggler from Mexico. I heard he was so fast they nicknamed him Formula Juan.