@HillbillyWV1965: Auto correct is my worst enema.
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@astutenewf: Hate when my GF asks me to hold her purse at the grocery store line cause I really don't like being that guy holding two purses.
@Cheeseboy22: BREAKING NEWS: North Korea may test a missil on April 10. They just need to find a gigantic bottle of Coke and a huge Mento.
@TheToddWilliams: Kid: WAAAHH! MY TOY IS BROKEN!! Dad: Nothing a little duct tape won't fix... Kid: mfflr..frrrr..strnnn
@GianDoh: I washed my antibiotic pills down with a probiotic shake and now I'm back to square one.