@joeyfullystated: Autocorrect changed Italian to Taliban, so now I'm sure the NSA is super interested in my ricotta cheese.
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@crylenol: *pops out of casket at funeral* ok but when I actually die you guys better have nicer things to say
@Adam14: My new bowflex comes tomorrow...so if anyone wants to buy a slightly used bowflex in a couple months let me know.
@CauseWereGuys: Lord please give me patience, because if you give me strength I may just beat someone to death.
@retardedwriter: Never understood the desperation behind placing ur order in English at KFC/McD. Heard a guy practicing his order while sanding in the queue.