@SortaBad: Avocado Toast was invented by the Deep State as a way to suppress the economic advancement of millennials
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@1Happytwit: My ex told me that Gaga's "Bad Romance" song reminds him of me. Now I'm glad I dumped him. What sort of idiot admits to listening to Gaga.
@cray_at_home_ma: I tucked my kids in last night and said, "See you in the morning!" and then we laughed and laughed. Saw them 16 more times before sunrise.
@McMcmadmac: When my wife got her tongue pierced I asked her why? She said To enhanthe the thektual thimulation.