@thetigersez: Aww, you "only wish the best for your exes?" That's cool, I lie about things too.
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@Snarfernini: You're nice, cute & single? Can you introduce me to your friend who looks like he'd never return my texts? Yeah the one with the girlfriend.
@TheRobCee: Dog The Bounty Hunter's greatest weakness is getting distracted when the fugitive throws a tennis ball.
@Sickayduh: "What's that?" - My new boss. He's very deciduous" "Decisive?" - Nope. I carved him from a potted tree. *squirrel peeks out of his mouth*