@missokistic: Ayn Rand, Rand Paul and Paul Ryan walk into a bar. The bartender serves them tainted alcohol because there are no regulations. They die.
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@cheeky__gal: I think the lady at the movies is "shushing" me, but I can't tell because I'm eating Doritos.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: I just got asked to work on a "special project" which is boss for "This was assigned to me but you're smarter so here you do it."
@littleshark87: "Auntie,how big can frogs be?" "Depends how many cars roll over it" I should do Kids TV shows.
@RatBatallion: The first rule of Mormon fight flub is go door to door talking about Mormon fight club .