@Bahstonlady: Babies make for the worst pets ever, I try to explain to all of the expectant mothers at the grocery store.
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@lazerdoov: Home Depot is having their "ultimate tool event" in case anyone wants to buy my cousin Tyler.
@hythemafia: When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people......
@online_rat: my son wont get past his bridge troll phase. its a phase all children have, where they live under a bridge and rob people with a gun