@shawnspree: Banned an 80 year old man for life from attending NBA games. What's that? Like maybe 10 years?
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@KtotheK39: Divorce lawyers all over the world are rubbing their hands together in glee now that Twitter DM has a picture function.
@sageboggs: ME: why am I always anxious? maybe watching TV will help- NEWS: IF THE HURRICANE DOESN'T KILL YOU, CLOWNS WILL
@BuckyIsotope: Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch an ounce of ganja Jack lit up and took a puff And Jill cuffed him. She was DEA. Jack died in prison.