@juliussharpe: Basically anything you buy at the hardware store looks like you're getting ready to take hostages.
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@1followernodad: I've started replacing "yes" with "sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti."
@EJGomez: [interrupts pastor] but jesus was crucified today shouldn't we call today "Bad Friday" or even "Kinda Messed Up They Killed Jesus Friday"
@behindyourback: Why do birds suddenly appear/every time you are near/just like me they long to be/eating your sandwich
@Samiam556: Apparently the safe word has changed to... NOT THERE IDIOT!!! Followed by a swift elbow to the eye....