@causticbob: be careful out there! #FiftyShadesOfGrey
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@PMTheron1: How much for the best friend? Manager : Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.
@heathesauruss: Am I supposed to know my own blood type? I don't even know what types of blood there are
@yonewt: My wife's signature move is asking me a question then turning on the faucet when I answer.
@BuckyIsotope: RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Praying for telemarketers to call so I can experience human contact as I slowly dissolve into dust