@Elizasoul80: Bears spend a bunch of time getting fat, sleep for a few months and then wake up skinny. Being a human is terrible.
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@timdonakowski: Okay, wait a second. I pee, I do my belt, THEN I wash my hands. I don't know about you but I've never, ever washed my belt.
@LizHackett: It's Sunday morning. My 80-year-old neighbor has hiked and weeded her garden. I spent ten minutes trying to reach the remote with my foot.
@_little_old_me: My eyesight is so bad that, after I took my contacts out last night, I chatted to my cat for 5 mins before I realised it was my handbag.