@AlexvanBeek: Being a bigger account doesn't make you a better person. We're all terrible people. We're on twitter. I threw a baby at a fox this morning.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AmishPornStar1: Interviewer: Why should we hire you? Me: Well, if you hire me, I will make all of your other employees look FANTASTIC by comparison.
@nowme_datta: How do people get their drivers to murder someone? Mine sulks if I ask him to fetch groceries.
@kyle_thatisall: How to make a Disney Pixar film: 1. Take something that doesn't talk 2. Make it talk