@KevinFarzad: Being a newspaper boy combines two of my favorite things: legally throwing things at people's houses & keeping my fellow citizens informed
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@MartaEffing: [Puzzle Group Therapy] Crossword: Just once, someone use a pen! Sudoku: Nobody likes math. Jigsaw: ..Then they glued me together! *sobs*
@llvvzz: If your problem can be solved by: Naps Cake Drugs Alcohol or Murder Then you don't really have a problem.
@TheTweetOfGod: One Mississippi... two Mississippi... just kidding! One Mississippi is quite enough.
@mackswift: Ladies, not every guy who talks to you wants to bang you. Some of us know that you have snacks in your purse.