@KevinFarzad: Being a newspaper boy combines two of my favorite things: legally throwing things at people's houses & keeping my fellow citizens informed
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@JohnHilsen: Of course climate change is man-made. It's all been meticulously orchestrated by the Titanic survivors, seeking revenge on that iceberg.
@dave_cactus: I told a server I'm going to New York this weekend, so when I left he said "have a good time in New York!" and I said "you too!" so long story short, he's coming to New York with me.