@_youhadonejob: Best courtroom exchange ever.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@seamussaid: dude told me he did a line with Emma Watson but I know he was lying - she's British, they call them "queues"
@ANNIEwayyyy: My mom recently figured out that the best way to get me to call her back right away is to text me that someone died but not tell me who.
@daviddeweil: If The Bachelor was realistic they'd ask each other where they want to go out to eat and then never make a decision.