@FallonTonight: Beware of the "party goblin"...
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@squirrel74wkgn: One time, I pulled my pants down to moon someone & accidentally opened the car door instead of the window & rolled down the street naked.
@briangaar: If a restaurant can afford to advertise on national television, you should never eat there
@Cpin42: Barista won't write "Air Bud was bullshit" on my coffee cup. We've been arguing for 20 minutes. HE’S A DOG THAT PLAYS BASKETBALL