@kerihw: Birds do it. Bees do it. Even educated fleas do it. Let's do it. Let's fly into a window.
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@eedrk: ME: ppl call dogs "doggo" now. i guess its a meme, i dont get it THERAPIST: this is $200/hr. do you want to talk about anything else? ME: no
@weinerdog4life: My wife doesn't know this, but for the first 3 years of our marriage I thought we were supposed to share a toothbrush.
@DaHess1: If bank website ads have taught me anything it's that white people love drinking coffee as they pay bills online in an empty loft apartment.
@jessokfine: Witches these days have it so easy. Do you know how hard it used to be to find so many newts? Now you get them with free 2 day shipping.