@_4kidscrazy: Birth control??? Here watch my kids for 10 minutes.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ArfMeasures: SEXY FLATMATE: I miss my boyfriend ME: The doctor? F: He never comes round anymore ME [smiling at my room full of apples] Yeah it's so weird
@FSUSteve: Ever been in the middle of writing a great tweet and think, did I just run someone over?
@longwall26: God: So I was, all, what if there was a fish made of jelly? Like, jelly but alive and in the sea? LOL [angels look nervously at one another]