@gerryhatric: Bound by notifications, we are the Fellowship of the Ding.
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@Sassafrantz: The average person has sex 103 times a year and it's almost March so that means only 103 more to go.
@jctwritesstuff: [First Date] Me: So, Construction? Him: Yeah M: You nail stuff? With your big hammer? H: M: Like to screw? H: M: Hey! Where are you going?
@JennyJohnsonHi5: Girl from my high school posted on Facebook that she got a "constellation prize" at a church carnival yesterday. She skipped school a lot.
@mrjohndarby: [city marathon] ME *handing out drinks to the passing runners*: DRINK? RUNNER *grabs drink from me*: THANKS ME *chasing*: SO WHAT ARE WE?