@Underchilde: Bring spoiled food to work enough and your coworkers eventually stop eating anything with your name on it.
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@click4amanda: HR: Can you explain this?? Me: I thought it was CORNhub, with recipes on how to make delicious corn and corn related dishes
@AristotlesNZ: Boss: Let's talk about the elephant in the room. Me: Not cool, dude. Jan's just pregnant. Him:.. Me: Jan if you report this I got your back.
@BoogTweets: Me: *violently swinging a stick* these piñatas are getting harder to hit Zip line park owner: Hello 911? He’s back again