@Underchilde: Bring spoiled food to work enough and your coworkers eventually stop eating anything with your name on it.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@zachreinert03: My friends holds her breath driving past cemeteries cause of superstition but I thought she just didn't want to be cocky about breathing
@MeemawKate: "Are you still watching?" Yes, Netflix. I didn't magically get my shit together in the last three hours.
@Up2Long: Didn't want cats ... had 2 cats. Didn't want marriage ... got married 2 times. Ok Karma ... I'm on to you. I don't want a million dollars
@Sophie2078: Me: I love it when I'm on top of his... Friend: Sophie! There are kids here! Me: Timeline. I was going to say timeline.