@itshotterhere: *calls you by wrong name in bed, blames autocorrect*
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@sarcasm_inc: -THAR SHE BLOWS *she stops* Does he REALLY have to be in here? "My seeing-eye pirate? Yes" But this is so intima- "Fill the balloons, Susan"
@DrawingShadows: Answer: Marijuana Question: Why am I sitting here on the couch eating ice cream with a fork, watching Telemundo and wearing one sock?
@Andrew_S_Dykes: As a child I had a medical condition that meant I had to eat soil 3 times a day in order to survive. Lucky my older brother told me about it