@itshotterhere: *calls you by wrong name in bed, blames autocorrect*
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@Angrea: OMG! A CUSTOMER ALMOST DIED IN FRONT OF ME TODAY!! But then I counted to 10 and put the scissors back in the drawer. She never even knew.
@jjhartinger: I just spent a ridiculous amount of time trying to spell Wednesday, so I canceled the event.
@nbadag: [very obviously being hit on] hahaha ok well, see you around [4 days later, cutting open a cantaloupe] wait a second