@CheryeDavis: Calm down check out guy, you don't have to inspect my $20 so hard, If I was talented enough to make my own, I wouldn't be in Quickie Mart..
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@bea_ker: WHAT YOU SAY: Hi, my name’s Timothy but you can call me Tim WHAT I HEAR: Hi, my name’s [DEAFENING STATIC] but you can call me ‘mate’ until one of us leaves this job
@Robert_Beau: Mom asked me if I would pick up some things for her at the 'Dime Store', great, now I've got to go all the way to the 70s.
@Ygrene: [On the phone with the police for the 7th time in 2 weeks] "Sir, again, we cannot arrest your cat"
@kamweru_: Saw a guy steal a car using a hanger so I did what any normal person would do, walked up to him & asked "You that guy from Grand Theft Auto?