@Darlainky: Calm down with that charm bracelet, lady. Every time you move your hand I look around for Santa's sleigh.
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@IamEnidColeslaw: I tell people my parents are divorced, but technically we lost my mom in a corn maze
@stuckinaportal: [we both wake up in a panic] her: i dreamed you died me: I DREAMED YOU LEFT ME ALONE AT THE GROCERY CHECKOUT LINE TO GRAB ANOTHER ITEM
@AimeeHelene1: Warning to friends: If you piss me off I'll put a for sale sign in my yard and list your phone number to call for inquiries.