@michael_raphone: "Can you make me look like this?" *shows hairdresser a picture of fire*
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@EndhooS: Ostrich: OMG SOMEONE KILLED MY DAD PLS HELP HE'S BEEN DECAPI- ...wait 911: *sigh* did he have - Ostrich: he had his head in the sand again
@iwearaonesie: [playing hangman] wife: Pick a letter son: Does it have to be from the alphabet? me *gets up* wife *sound of his college fund jar breaking*
@faisaladam_: In Soviet Russia a bar walks into men. The case of the man-killing-bar remains unsolved.