@nayele18: Can't afford those fancy water parks, so I just throw cups of water in my kids faces when they least expect it.
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@TheHyyyype: ME: hey buddy, can you go in there and buy me a pack of cigarettes? GUY: dude, you're like 45, why can't you buy them yourself? ME: because i don't have any money
@Purple_Pito: My cousin posted a meme in family group chat and my aunt said "maybe this is the year you find a husband like the way you find good jokes" 💀
@mattZillaaaa: Today is a new day. Be thankful. Do something nice for yourself. Call someone you haven't spoken to in a while. Run with a pair of scissors