@genepompa: Can't believe my dog just ran into Petco and left me in the car with the windows rolled up
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@StoferComic: An argument with my wife is like the gas pedal on a Prius. I can put my foot down, but I don't really expect much to happen...
@WhosTheresa: I could've had a kid with a heroin addiction but Noooo. Instead my kid wants to join a Christian rock band.
@crunchenhancer: A 6'-6" guy doesn't scare me, but my 5'-1" wife does, if you were looking for inspiration to get married.
@Mr_Kapowski: Advertised as a "Cougar Cruise" Reality - Weight loss cruise where live cougars are released & you spend your vacation fleeing large cats