@heatherjs: If you walk around in knight's armor long enough, people will just get used to it.
@SheBanggs: It's cute how they show subtitles during Here Comes Honey Boo Boo & pretend that anyone watching might actually know how to read.
@Skullcat: Actually, I'd rather you shut your talk-hole, not your pie-hole. If you have a hole that gives pie, I'm going in there, because HELLO PIE.
@thetits: COP: do you know why I pulled you over?
ME: *hands him a puppy and drives off*
[3 years later]
COP *walking his dog*: wait a second…
@Chumpstring: [Death Row]
GUARD: last requests?
INMATE: a little heroin would be nice
TINKER BELL: *chloroforms guard*
INMATE: I meant the drug stupid
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