@Zombie_Kit: Cats are so lucky. Nobody thinks twice when they run from company and hide under the bed. I do it and its "weird".
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@deathoftheparty: you knew the backstreet boys were actually friends because when the one boy asks if hes "sexual" the rest of the boys all agree that he is
@TheFraudMallu: My grandmother reads obituary column in the newspaper everyday. It is pretty much like searching for your childhood friends on Facebook.
@SirEviscerate: Me: I'm having a problem with my computer: IT guy: Have you tried punching it? Me: That's the first thing I tried. I'm not an idiot.
@flashember: [Crime Scene] Detective: Looks like the killer used a wheelbarrow to dump the victim. [in the shed a wheelbarrow grins, his seventh kill]