@PaperWash: Caught my son smoking pot then my wife walked in and caught me and our son smoking pot. Anyways I'm grounded.
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@noog: One time I made a snowman and gave him a cucumber nose. Carrot noses are the standard protocol but I'm what u would call a rebel.
@smithsara79: OB-GYN: Ever consider having kids? Me: *remembers the time I heard some man tell a little girl to smile & she told him to die* Just once.