@PaperWash: Caught my son smoking pot then my wife walked in and caught me and our son smoking pot. Anyways I'm grounded.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Dutch_50: Headline: "Russian Jet Shot Down by Turkey" My 1st thought was, "Holy shit the bird has gone Rambo." I must have Thanksgiving on my mind.
@notalogin: Headline: "Female-named hurricanes kill more than male hurricanes because people don't respect them, study finds". AKA, "My eye is up here".
@Underchilde: My wife told me to strive for perfection, so I divorced her and started dating a swimsuit model.