@markleggett: Celebrities are so rich because they save money every time they attend a movie premiere for free.
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@Shock_Monster: If I could choose any one mythological creature to become alive & real, I'd have to pick: My girlfriend.
@mattytalks: A very busty woman whispers to me "I want you to tell me if these look real" my eyes widen, then she takes out pictures of the moon landing
@KentTheG: I dated a meteorologist once just so I could be with a woman who wasn't right all the time.
@jared_ish: I am not "aware" of any "laws" that "forbid" the use of excessive "air quotes" officer "Barnes."