@MatCro: "Chest, chest, chest and chest, chest and chest" - T-Rex singing "Head, shoulders, knees and toes".
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@neonwario: I excuse myself to the washroom before I order You walk in and see me, leaning towards the mirror repeating "I'll have the hamburger please"
@ChickenFrecklez: Me texting friend: Hey! What's up? Buddy: *sends picture of ceiling* Me: I am so glad I didn't ask "how's it hanging"
@TheFearBoners: The only thing more boring than Lance Armstrong's interview is the Tour de France.
@MindyFurano: Kissing someone mid sentence is only cute in movies. I will press my hand against your face and slowly push it way until I'm done talking.