@moose_chocolate: "Clique" is a French word meaning "small group of insufferable douchebags".
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@Okeating: My husband complained that I never do a Sunday roast so I've spent the last hour writing jokes about his bald spot, his skinny legs and the fact that he can't grow a beard.
@dance_blessed: Remember: You are like a snowflake. Beautiful. Unique. White. Only here for a short time. People get mad when you sit on their cars.
@EricMarten: It must have been really strange for Jesus to be the only white guy in the entire Middle East.