@Tierno158: CNN reports Hurricane Patricia "hit luxury resorts and impoverished villages with equal ferocity." Did they expect wealth-based discernment?
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@shutupmikeginn: The USA is having so many disasters and tragedies you'd almost think it was built on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds.
@Tw1tter_K1tten: It's weird that on this date in Back to the Future they didn't show people incessantly posting about Back to the Future.
@Reverend_Scott: [shows up 2 hours late for interview] Sorry I was trying to get out of a beanbag chair.
@undeadmolly: 35% of all hospital deaths are caused by the attending physician failing to yell "Don't you die on me!" at the right moment.