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@aryuserius: Coke Zero
Well played Pepsi.
@shariv67: Him "You run like a gazelle."
Me "I'm graceful?"
Him "No. You'd be easy prey for a mountain lion."
@Jayneymoo: I don't really care who came first, the chicken or the egg.
I'm just glad somebody decided both could be broken and fried.
@duplicitron: Once a guy at the grocery store yelled at me to stop talking on a banana like a phone so I hung up and shot him with it.
@RunJeffreyRun: I just saw a guy with the Monster energy logo tattooed on his neck, so if your village is missing their idiot, we have him.
@9GAG: Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman.. Then be Batman.