@viadear: Confusing the word, "jacuzzi" with, "yakuza" has gotten me in hot water with the Japanese mafia more than once.
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@MaraWritesStuff: BROTHER: The Godfather is on? That's not very Thanksgiving-y. ME: Well, it's about family...
@MarlonBrandNO: ME: I wish I could just go back to the good old day FRIEND: don't you mean good old days? ME: no, I just had the one
@LizHackett: I feel like I'm not getting the full experience of a gas station bathroom if I don't cut and dye my hair and change my identity.
@TwoSapphiresBlu: Daughter: Why don't kids at school get my sarcastic humor? Me: Because they have boring parents, darling.