@markleggett: Congratulations on being the kind of person who corrects the grammar of others, unsolicited. You're the Microsoft Word Paperclip.
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@WheelTod: I once accidentally broke up with a girl on a broken-down train, when I said "I don't think this is going anywhere."
@PieChord: The only time my ex will ever scream "DEEPER, DEEPER" is when they are lowering my casket into the ground.
@iamspacegirl: Columbus: I claim this cake for Spain. Also these Slim Jims are for Spain, too. And maybe the me: dude, that's my mom's cassero- C: Spain.