@illuminatedwndr: cop pulls me over 2nite. comes 2 my window n asks, Cop: "do you know y i pulled u over?" Me: "because Batman is catching all the criminals"
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@OneFunnyMummy: Normal people driving by a construction site: wonder what they're building... Me: what a great place to bury a body!
@JediGigi: Me: You're such a good boy. Dog: *tail wagging* Please leave the room so I can eat the couch.