@CM2BTTHD: CPR refresher class. We're told, "If they're not breathing, there's no way you can make it worse." Woman then trips; kicks dummy's head off.
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@NickBossRoss: A friend and I just decided that in 10 years if we aren't married we will tell each other what's honestly wrong about ourselves.
@brittwastaken: Want a way to lose weight? Swap the sugar in your coffee for cocaine. All the tachycardia and sweating, none of the calories.
@shanethevein: I see dead people. Well technically they're stupid people, but give me a few minutes.