@lilgapeach30: Daaaaamn boy. Are you an Adobe update? Cause you keep showing up and I still don't want you.
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@murrman5: can you start monday at 8? "yes, thank you for the opportunity" [calls new boss at his home on sunday night] hello? "am or pm?"
@TheThryll: You can usually win any arm wrestling contest by simultaneously leaning in for a kiss.
@VerbsRProudest: Never answer knocking at your door. It's always people. Always. Never giant chocolate bars. Only people.
@PhuckinCody: Even after seeing all of the Jurassic Park movies I still feel like a dinosaur theme park sounds like a really good idea