@amishschool: * Dalai Lama goes on killing spree after listening to my coworker eat soup *
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@AngelaEhh: My body keeps doing these muscle twitches like it wants me to get off this couch and move around. HAHAHAHA. As if.
@RoosterMustache: Me: u can walk around without shoes Teacher: right Me: but after a while it hurts your feet Teacher: ok Me: so time wounds all the heels
@BartenderMB: My girlfriend says I'm easily distracted during sex and it's a problem. Well, better get back to it. Bye.
@mikescollins: Just convinced my Mom she won't get Wolf of Wall Street if she doesn't see Teen Wolf first. Please play along.