@DaddyJew: Date: you've already made me laugh, you can do no wrong
Me: challenge accepted.
@Broo_Swain: idaho is my favorite state that sounds like a woman who's comfortable with her own sexual indiscretions
@awkwardphilippe: Confusing prank: Obtain a grizzly bear, name it Love then call 911 and say that Love is tearing you apart
@ClichedOut: Waiter: how did u find your meal
Me: *sweating* i...i looked down
@leshnevsky: Today I played dead with my 5yo nephew. He cried for 5 seconds, then grabbed my iPhone and run away.
@TylerLinkin: Jack LaLanne died two years ago and he's still in better shape than I am.