@shkeeber: Dating must've been so easy for cavemen. This my cave. This my fire. You like rock? I have many.
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@DaddyBeerGuy: My daughter is worse than a twitter newbie.. She manually Retweets everything I say... To my wife!
@TheIronSherk: I can't believe how different life was before *googles* Al Gore invented the Internet
@IamEnidColeslaw: watching my cats groom each other and it feels like I should be throwing money at them
@PaperWash: *Takes ex girlfriend's poem on Antiques Road Show* Sir these are worthless *Winks at camera* Told you Karen!