@NicestHippo: Did Delilah ever tell that guy what New York City is like
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@BlindChow: Hi, I'd like a salamus sandwich, please. "You mean salami?" No, just a single salamus. "Um ok, anything else on that?" Yes, one pepperonus.
@kumailn: 5 people hurt themselves by accidentally discharging guns at gun shows. Maybe the best way to handle gun nuts is to just let them have guns.
@LoveNLunchmeat: Some peanut butter M&M's just rolled under the fridge, and now I understand every sad love song ever written.
@pinupteacher: All I'm saying is God wouldn't have given me this wild hair if he didn't want me to store stuff in it. *baby hedgehog peaks out*